By April Agle, a new Marine Mom
I remember thinking that there was so much that I wanted Jared to know before he left. I wanted him to remember that even when he thinks he is alone, that God is always, always with him. I had these fears of the drill instructors tearing down Jared’s self confidence. I wanted him to remember that no matter what anyone says that he is a wonderful person. I wanted him to know that he was likely to get home sick and that it was okay. We would be praying for him and that the separation would only be for just over 12 weeks.
I remember Jared telling me he did not want me to go to the Recruiter’s Office to drop him off on Sunday. At first, I was crushed and yes, my feelings were hurt. It took me a bit to figure out why he did not want me to go with him. It was more than he was afraid I would embarrass him – I figured it out – if I cried he would cry and he did not want to do that in front of anyone especially another Marine or another Recruit.
So I told him I was going, all of us were taking him, and I promised not to embarrass him. I made a point of speaking positive and smiling on our way to the Recruiter’s Office on Sunday. I was Miss Positive Attitude with no crying. We go to the Recruiter’s and only the Recruiter was there. We all hugged Jared. I held him tight and told him I was so proud of him and that I knew he would be an excellent Marine. And then we left him.
Wow. I felt a huge weight. Roger, Rylee and I were all very stoic and I think we were containing our emotions. All it would take was for one of us to let loose and we would all lose it. I guess we were being strong for each other.
The plan was that Jared was to stay in a hotel in Tampa and on Monday morning he would go to fill out his final paperwork and then board a bus heading to Paris Island, South Carolina.
Monday, August 9, 2010 at 11:00pm Roger’s phone rang. Roger barely said hello and you could hear Jared almost shouting in a shaky voice. “Recruit Agle has reached destination Paris Island. Please do not attempt to contact me. Please do not send any bulky packages. …. That is all”. And he hung up.
You could tell he was reading a script of some kind. Wow and that was it. Roger and I looked at each other almost in shock. I was a bit upset because we did not get to tell Jared anything, not I love you, not how was your trip, nothing. No one really prepared me for that.
I spent a good deal of time over his life teaching Jared the importance of calling or texting me so I knew where he was at. I found out the Marine’s don’t really care what your mama wants. So I guess this was a reality check for me. Jared was going to need a lot of prayer and I was going to do that.
- The house seemed different right away. Jared had been gone before on trips with the fire department for maybe four days. This time it was different. The house was quieter and felt less full somehow. Jared was not due back for quite a while.
And so we waited. And we waited. Every day we checked the mail box. And we waited some more. We wondered, we prayed, and we waited some more. No letter. Yes – I was a bit unrealistic. I wanted a letter within days of his leaving with his address so I could send him mail. The day Jared left I started writing him. A paragraph each day so he would be aware that he was not out of our thoughts. And so the training of a Marine’s mother began.
The people that I work with are just terrific and they have helped me each step of the way. I constantly was talking about Jared and they listened. Everyone has been very supportive. I work with a lot of veterans and former military. They would share stories with me and were always available to listen to me. Without this tolerance and support, I think I would have gone crazy. It was very helpful to be able to talk about Jared. I appreciate their on-going interest in Jared’s career, it means so much to me.
Finally, one week later, we received something in the mail with Jared’s writing on the envelope. We were thrilled only to be somewhat disappointed. It was a form letter. But, it had his address finally also, a whole list of what not to send. The only hand written note was a line that said ‘Can send Cliff bars’. Okay excellent something to do for the mom who is missing her son.
I had a mission and I was glad of it. The only problem was that I had no idea what a Cliff bar was, but if my son wanted Cliff bars he was going to get them. And so I found out that a Cliff bar is a protein bar. We mailed them to him the next day and I felt relieved that I was able to do something.
- I now had Jared’s address and another ‘mom to do’ thing which I so wanted. I made up mailing labels for his grandparents and everyone. The address is quite a big address so I thought labels would help everyone. I have some advice for anyone that is sending their child to boot camp – make address labels. I made up return address labels for Jared’s boot camp address and mailing labels of our home address so he send us mail. Jared said these were wonderful because he never had much time and he was tired and rushed. The labels saved him time. Also, send stamps. They don’t really have time to buy stamps and who wants to wait on them to get around to buying postage.
- Mail became our link to Jared. Our family used to go 3-4 days before we would check the mail. Now, we were checking the mail every day.We finally received a hand written real letter from Jared a couple of days after the form letter. We all got teary and I think we read and discussed his letter for days. He had a ‘p.s.’ at the bottom of the letter that said, “Went to church. I look forward to going Sunday.” I was pleased about this and knew it would help Jared. I also know that he probably was only going to church because it got him away from the drill instructors. But hey he was going to church no matter the reason.
April Agle works in WUSF’s business office and among her many duties, she helps me and other staff with Human Resource issues. Her other contributions:
Here’s a link to WUSF’s first story when Jared graduated boot camp.
Filed under: Marines, Military families Tagged: | April Agle, Marine Delayed Enlistment Program, Marine PFC Jared Agle, Paris Island boot camp, postaday2011, United States Marine Corps, USMC, Zephyrhills High School